New Kid on the Block

This morning I was standing at the kitchen window again, waiting for my kettle to boil again and keeping my eye out for mad cat...again. When I noticed an addition to the feline menagerie plaguing the estate. Reader, I give thee fat cat. I have never seen fat cat before. But goodness me, is it fat. Like all the other cats (apart from mad cat), fat cat is black and white. But he has a fair bit of white on his coat, unlike blind cat, three-legged cat and broken-legged cat. Mad cat looks like he's mixed with leopard or tiger or something. His coat's a bit stripy and mixed up. I sometimes wonder if that's what contributing to his madness.

Anyway, I clocked fat cat while he was waddling past the same spot that mad cat always hangs out. It's almost as if he was marking the path as his own. He even heaved himself up on to the massive boulder John used to put tuna for mad cat on. I have no idea where the hell fat cat wobbled in from, but I think he's too fat to be a stray. I mean, a fat stray animal is as much an oxymoron as a fat vagrant. Hmmm.

So now we have fat cat thrown into the mix. Steups. What's next? Well-read cat? Handsome cat? Foolish cat? Sigh. I just hate them all. Haven't seen mad cat since Friday afternoon though. In my head, he's in some evil lair throwing darts at a picture of me and making notes about my daily routine.