I pity the fool!

Sigh!

I was in Starbucks with my husband a couple weeks ago. I'd come home from uni early and decided I wanted to go to Hanley to return a couple things I was having serious buyer's remorse over. So of course, returning things is strenuous work so we went to Starbucks so I could replenish my depleted reserves with a Hazelnut hot chocolate...obviously.

So we're sitting, having drinks and chatting. When I notice we seemed to be surrounded by babies. It looked like everyone who was boning down in early 2008 had dropped their sprogs and a new army of spring babies was taking hold. This of course does not help the insane broodiness I have been feeling of late. I use the term insane because I am actually resentful of some of these women who feel no shame in showing off their fecundity to the world. I am bitter and twisted and jealous as hell.

But amidst all the new life, I spotted someone who deserved my pity. He was the son of two of the most unattractive people I have ever seen in my entire life. I felt sorry for the poor little thing, saddled with them two as parents forever more. Sigh! Saddlebags, blackened teeth, thinning hair and both of them wearing glasses. Things did not look promising. Then there was the sartorial horror. Unintentional high-waisted jeans, white socks, dirty old trainers. Oh my!

I mean, I know I'm no specimen of perfection, what with my own dental horrors going on and my penchant for black jumpers. And yes I do too wear white socks. But I'm foreign. And I have cool hair. So when I do it, I'm being exotic and daring. When some chav from Stoke-on-Trent busts that out, there is obviously cause for concern.

Bah!

But I shouldn't bitch like this though. It's going to come back and bite me in the arse. I just know it!